Willie Wastle dwalt on Tweed,The spot they ca’d it Linkumdoddie;Willie was a wabster gude,Could stown a clue wi’ ony body:He had a wife was dour and din,O Tinkler Maidgie was her mither;Sic a wife as Willie had,I wad na gie a button for her!8
She has an e’e, she has but ane,The cat has twa the very colour;Five rusty teeth, forbye a stump,A clapper tongue wad deave a miller:A whiskin beard about her mou’,Her nose and chin they threaten ither;Sic a wife as Willie had,I wadna gie a button for her!16
She’s bow-hough’d, she’s hein-shin’d,Ae limpin leg a hand-breed shorter;She’s twisted right, she’s twisted left,To balance fair in ilka quarter:She has a lump upon her breast,The twin o’ that upon her shouther;Sic a wife as Willie had,I wadna gie a button for her!24
Auld baudrons by the ingle sits,An’ wi’ her loof her face a-washin;But Willie’s wife is nae sae trig,She dights her grunzie wi’ a hushion;Her walie nieves like midden-creels,Her face wad fyle the Logan Water;Sic a wife as Willie had,I wadna gie a button for her!32