---
title: "Lines to a Gentleman, Who had sent the Poet a Newspaper, and offered"
subtitle: "to continue it free of Expense"
author: "Robert Burns"
form: "Poem"
year: "1790"
location: "Ellisland"
source: "Project Gutenberg #1279 — Poems and Songs of Robert Burns"
source_url: "https://www.gutenberg.org/cache/epub/1279/pg1279.txt"
canonical_url: "https://robert-burns.com/poems/lines-to-a-gentleman-who-had-sent-the-poet-a-newspaper-and-offered/"
---

# Lines to a Gentleman, Who had sent the Poet a Newspaper, and offered

### to continue it free of Expense

## Poem
Kind Sir, I’ve read your paper through,  
And faith, to me, ’twas really new!  
How guessed ye, Sir, what maist I wanted?  
This mony a day I’ve grain’d and gaunted,  
To ken what French mischief was brewin;  
Or what the drumlie Dutch were doin;  
That vile doup-skelper, Emperor Joseph,  
If Venus yet had got his nose off;  
Or how the collieshangie works  
Atween the Russians and the Turks,  
Or if the Swede, before he halt,  
Would play anither Charles the twalt;  
If Denmark, any body spak o’t;  
Or Poland, wha had now the tack o’t:  
How cut-throat Prussian blades were hingin;  
How libbet Italy was singin;

If Spaniard, Portuguese, or Swiss,  
Were sayin’ or takin’ aught amiss;  
Or how our merry lads at hame,  
In Britain’s court kept up the game;  
How royal George, the Lord leuk o’er him!  
Was managing St. Stephen’s quorum;  
If sleekit Chatham Will was livin,  
Or glaikit Charlie got his nieve in;  
How daddie Burke the plea was cookin,  
If Warren Hasting’s neck was yeukin;  
How cesses, stents, and fees were rax’d.  
Or if bare arses yet were tax’d;  
The news o’ princes, dukes, and earls,  
Pimps, sharpers, bawds, and opera-girls;  
If that daft buckie, Geordie Wales,  
Was threshing still at hizzies’ tails;  
Or if he was grown oughtlins douser,  
And no a perfect kintra cooser:  
A’ this and mair I never heard of;  
And, but for you, I might despair’d of.  
So, gratefu’, back your news I send you,  
And pray a’ gude things may attend you.

Ellisland, Monday Morning, 1790.

---

Source: [Project Gutenberg #1279 — Poems and Songs of Robert Burns](https://www.gutenberg.org/cache/epub/1279/pg1279.txt)  
Canonical HTML: https://robert-burns.com/poems/lines-to-a-gentleman-who-had-sent-the-poet-a-newspaper-and-offered/